Do you consider sex to be exercise? In a recent survey of over 2,000 Americans by LoveHoney, 71 per cent of people said ‘yes’.
I’d certainly agree that a good sex session can cover cardio, flexibility and mobility. For several years between being a striptease artist and a sex coach, I worked as a personal fitness trainer. I was frustrated during that time not to be working in the sexy world and used to fantasise about launching a dedicated ‘fitness and flexibility for sex’ class, or dominatrix-fitness where I literally whipped people into shape…
I didn’t launch either of those, but I did always include stretches and moves which would be good for maintaining an active sex life in the workouts I gave my clients.
I can think of a few kinky uses for this exercise kit... [Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash]
LoveHoney’s report suggests people stretch before attempting more challenging positions such as Reverse Cowgirl. I’d hope there would have been a long period of general mobilising and pulse-raising sexual activity before such a challenging position was undertaken, and that dedicated stretching wouldn’t be necessary! But always listen to your body and know any restrictions.
Some gentle exercise before sex starts is certainly better before partnered sex than jumping into it straight off the sofa. It warms up muscles and joints and allows you to focus on you partner rather than on the TV or your mobile. Going for a walk together without your phones is perfect.
You can spend your walk warming up your most important sex organ: your brain. Reminisce about great sex you’ve had together in the past… or fantasise together… or talk about what you’re going to do to each other when you get home. If there were challenges to you getting together in the first place, talk about that – reminiscing about these is a trait couples who maintain hot sex for decades share (according to Jack Morin in his classic book The Erotic Mind).
Sex certainly won’t replace workout sessions completely (unless it’s very active, acrobatic, varied and frequent – I had a friend with an un-toned physique who went into porn performing and within a few months looked like she’d been hitting the gym daily!). Maintaining one’s sex life is a great motive for going to the gym. Certainly when I was a personal trainer my fitter clients reported less aches and pains which would limit sex and were more flexible, whatever their age.
Fitness also boosts our physical confidence and self-esteem, much quicker than visible results are seen – new clients would be telling me how much happier they were way before there was any measurable change in body measurements. When we feel happy with our physiques we are more confident in bed (click here for my 'How To Feel Confident Naked' instant access workshop).
Exercise also reduces stress, and as we know, stress is a big dampener on desire. Vigorous exercise is best for this (to replicate running away from a saber-toothed tiger) but any is better than none.
So my suggestion for you is to plan an erotic hour or two, prep the bedroom, then go for a brisk walk or do some other pulse-raising physical activity first. Use the time to think about or talk about good sex, then see how that affects what happens when you get home…
