Hi, I’m Ruth, and my mission is to help you to become the active, joyful creator of your fulfilling erotic life.
As an eroticism and sex coach, I will help you understand where you are now in your life erotically, how you came to be here, what you want for your ideal future and how to make that happen. You will see the results of the work radiate throughout your life, far beyond the bedroom.
How did I arrive at this work?
The first steps on my journey came in 2001, when I signed up for classes at London School Of Striptease. I fell in love with the empowerment, creativity, freedom and fun I found in this artform, and ditched my career in journalism. That was the start of 12 exciting years which saw me dancing (based in London, UK), performing internationally, modelling, running events, teaching striptease and pole dancing, and campaigning for the rights of adult entertainment workers. I also campaigned widely for the erotic rights of people with disabilities and won an Erotic Award for this.
The lessons I learnt about erotic empowerment came from some unexpected angles. I felt hugely empowered myself in a multitude of ways; as a teacher I saw my students blossom into confident, joyful women; and I saw my diverse audiences empowered by being recognised as erotic beings (for more on this topic see the full version of this article in my Blog). Erotic empowerment and recognition allowed us all to step into the rest of our lives more confident, energised and happier.
I left the industry after meeting my soulmate, moving to a village and becoming a stepmum. I missed dancing terribly, but my focus became building a happy stepfamily, while working as a fitness trainer. When my stepkids left for university, I allowed myself to acknowledge I wanted more, but returning to dancing wasn’t practical and didn’t feel right. I was drawn to transformational life coaching and studied for a diploma, but it hadn’t occurred to me to return to the erotic arena. Then an acquaintance asked me to coach her around sexual happiness and identity: “I can’t think of anyone else I’d be comfortable talking to”. That was my lightbulb moment and the start of my coaching business.
Now I combine my lived experience of erotic empowerment with transformational coaching skills. Coaching is a process of asking the right questions and providing a safe supported space for the client to deeply explore their wants and needs, where these come from and how to fit them into their life going forward [for more on this see ‘Is Coaching For Me?’ coming soon in FAQs].
Everything I encountered in my dancing years (which included I estimate over 10,000 hours of frank conversations, both in front of and behind the stage curtain), has left me unshockable and utterly non-judgemental. Seeing how an individual can blossom through coaching not just in their erotic life but in all areas of their life, and how sex can be transformed from something to be dreaded, tolerated, or something that is absent, into a source of intense joy and inspiration in life, brings me the same fulfilment dancing did.
I would love to discuss where you are erotically and what you most desire from your erotic life
Looking forward to hearing from you!